Holy Smoke

Words & music copyright 1999 by Howard Ashby Kranz

G D C G D C

1. If the truth really matters, if life’s really there

Em C Am D

Then God must be watching over us, laughing somewhere.

G D C G D C

But if it’s all just illusion, man I don’t want to know.

Em C Am D

Just pass out the 3-D glasses, and on with the show.

C G C G

Cause I want to reach heaven, but I don’t want to die.

C Am D G D C G D C

Unless God’s got a sense of humor, I’m gonna fry; I’m gonna fry.

Bm C D G

Bridge 1. My special prosecutor called to help me confess.

Bm C D G

He said I hereby accuse you of—wait; I’ll just let you guess.

E Am E Am

But the rumors are flying, while you’re just singing songs

E Am C D G D C

That at some point in your life you have done something horribly wrong, something horribly wrong!

G D C G D C

2. Years ago in a cloakroom, Sister Kenneth Marie

Em C Am D

Found my hand in my pocket; I was doomed for eternity.

G D C G D C

Till an underage angel rescued me from myself.

Em C Am D

I was quiet and studious; she was into good health.

C G C G

And I try to reach heaven, but I’d rather not die.

C Am D G D C G D C

And if God’s got no sense of humor, then I’m gonna fry; I’m gonna fry.

Bm C D G

Bridge 2. That real cute teletubbie, the articulate one!

Bm C D G

Every morning in tele-dreamland we romp and have fun.

E Am E Am

And our hallowed forefathers all got martyred for this:

E Am C D G D C

Now the whole rule of law comes unsealed with a kiss, unsealed with a kiss.

G D C G D C

3. So if stuff really matters, if life’s really there

Em C Am D

Then I’m sure God is watching over us, laughing somewhere.

G D C G D C

But if love’s just illusion, hey I don’t want to know.

Em C Am D

Just crank up the virtual being, and on with the show.

C G C G

Cause I want to be reborn, but I don’t want to die.

C Am D G D C G D C

Unless God’s got a sense of humor, then I’m gonna fry; I’m gonna fry.